Emmet (
i_am_emmet) wrote2022-03-26 08:56 pm
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IC Contact
WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, EMMET. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 018.07.154.55 *** KUDARI has joined 018.07.154.55 | ||||
WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, EMMET. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 018.07.154.55 *** KUDARI has joined 018.07.154.55 | ||||
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[He puts Cupcake down on the couch and she walks over to him and curls up in a small cream-colored ball next to him.]
And knowing what buttons can and can't be pushed. Which really only comes with time.
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But - [scoff.] - if I didn't know better, I could blame it on people not having real problems. I'm not sensitive, I just - I just have it worse than you. [Voice low, exposed. This is a pretty deep dig into his own self-awareness, and it doesn't mortify him nearly as viscerally as other things but it is still embarrassing to say out loud.] But that's not how it works. Especially not here. [So what's his real excuse?]
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[Emmet nods a little.]
Here is weird, because it is a weird situation to start off with. I don't think anyone would ever expect to come to a place like this, so we all are responding in weird ways.
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Shrugs, though.] I was already like this.
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You don't need to spare my feelings.
[knowing full well that Emmet doesn't, but wow that just felt like. bad. for some reason]
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Well. Speaking of sensitivity, now he gets to try to figure out why that jabbed him in the mood. Yay.
Mnnrrg.]
...What do you mean, "everyone is sensitive"?
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[Emmet says this easily.]
Everyone has a button, or a trigger or something because life comes with good and bad.
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Pensive facewrinkle for a second .]
That's...not what I mean by sensitive.
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[Emmet leans forward a little, curious to listen.]
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Emmet, you know what I'm like, [he groans, puts his face in his hands, and kind of slides down to the floor??
pwease.]
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FUN FACT WHEN YOU BLUSH GREEN YOUR FACE DOESN'T GET HOT so you are just none the wiser. Good thing he's already rubbing his hands on his face.]
Rewind to the "keeping to himself" part.
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And is there anything wrong with that?
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[God okay hold on he needs to sit back up and get his shit back together. Knuckling his face a little to make the thoughts go faster. He's still not sure - even though he knows! he knows - that he isn't being punked, or baited into saying it out loud or something, because the difference here is so obvious to him.]
Maybe "sensitive" is the wrong word. [Shit together. Calm. Collected.] Does it make more sense if I say, "reactive". Or maybe "paranoid". [Calm. Collected.]
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[Emmet scoops up Cupcake and hands her over to Gladion.]
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Again he is silent as if waiting for more on that.]
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Listening.
Go on.]
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And if you aren't in a competitive situation, you only stay with that. Not that it is bad or anything.
But when you have to battle a lot- you start wondering more, looking at the situation more, trying to figure out the best move sets and people to align yourself with.
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cw emotional abuse
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